Injustice

I'm in a serious funk today. I stayed up too late last night talking on the phone with a friend about all my pregnancy issues and then didn't sleep well and had to get up too early. I'll have to make sure I go home and go straight to bed after my massage tonight. I think looking forward to that is the only thing getting me through this day.

A month ago I posted a comment to a post Carol wrote. I mentioned about a memorial service for an 11 year old girl who died. Yesterday I decided to email her father because I saw something in Dear Annie about Compassionate Friends and wanted to let him know about it if he hadn't heard about that support group. I said that I went to a meeting last year, but felt out of place because the people there had older children who had died (children who were generally 5 years old or older, I think there were a few who died in their 20's). I mentioned about my losses and specifically about Isabella and Sean, but mostly just wanted to tell him I had been thinking about him and his daughter a lot and offered an ear if he needed it.

I got a response back and have emailed a bit back and forth today. I'm feeling so sad and I don't know if it's because of our email conversation or something else or weird hormones but I feel really down in the dumps today.

I guess I'm just railing against the injustice of it all. How can the sun shine and the sky be so blue and yet so many babies and children die.

I wish I could bring them back.