Starting to Feel More Like Me

So a lot has happened since last Tuesday. Here's a recap:

Wednesday I went to my first day at the "Partial Hospitalization Program". I had never done group therapy so I didn't know what to expect. It was strange because no one was really open about why they were there so it was hard for me to be open. Plus I'm not much for talking in front of a group. So I basically felt like, ok, this is my first day, it's too soon to tell if this is going to help or not.

Thursday, wasn't much different. Friday was worse. I was wondering what the point was. Some of the sessions were so removed from anything I could relate to myself that I wondered why I bothered coming. The one interesting thing was that in the afternoon on Friday we played a game. We divided into two teams and all wrote down three things about ourselves that the others probably wouldn't know on separate pieces of paper and it all went in a basket for each team. Then we took turns reading the slips and the other team would try to guess who it was about. The interesting part was that people kept guessing me for other people's slips, only one of mine got read during the game. But then we ran out of time and everyone wanted to know what my other things were, it felt good for people to be curious about me.

My three things were:

I was in the equestrian (horseback riding) club for 2 years in college.

I have been the top fundraiser for the Walk for Diabetes for the last four years, raising over $11k.

I can play the piano, although I haven't in a while, I still can, just not well.

They immediately guessed me for the first one when it was read during the game.

So I went to "partial" this morning and instead of it being more of the same, I felt like things were starting to click. I talked with some people before group, I talked more during group and the second session than I have all three days last week combined and then I sat with some folks at lunch time and talked some more. I feel more comfortable now that I'm starting to get to know some folks. There were less people at partial today, so I didn't feel like there was a huge audience. So I'm excited that it went well today.

As far as the rest of the week, I've been exercising every day (except today because I had to help my husband pack for a business trip and it was rainy out). My husband and I went out to dinner with another couple on Saturday night and had a good time. And then a good portion of the weekend was spent putting together a puzzle I ordered special for my husband's birthday that is a map centered on his parents' house in his hometown. I thought about getting it centered on our house, but it would be a lot of forest which doesn't seem as interesting as lots of streets, highways, and building labels. It was a lot of fun to put together and I'm not even from there. I want to get one of my hometown, that would be super fun too, even though the ocean would probably take up a quarter of it. In case anyone wants to get a puzzle for themselves.

I watched one of my favorite movies tonight, Stardust. It's a great story, I highly recommend it.

My husband is safely in his hotel room now, and now it's time for me to go to bed. I'm going to try to get up in the morning and exercise before going to partial.

As far as Mondays go, this was one of the better ones.